Classical Baby

Every Saturday and Sunday morning, while I take a much desired extended shower or bath, my husband watches Classical Baby with our 1 year old. This is a cute show featuring classical (and as my husband has pointed out, 1 contemporary) pieces of music set to animated sketches starring a baby conductor. Yesterday my husband asked me if I regularly put it on for Benjamin during the week while he is at work.

"No", I replied, "That is yours and the baby's thing. He only watches it with Daddy". My husband liked that. I think he partly liked the idea that he had something to share exclusively with our son and that would be something special Benjamin could always look back on with fond memories of his Daddy. That means a lot to me too. But I also see it as having a deep and impactful effect on our son in a slightly different way. I wonder if Benjamin's Daddy would agree with me. (A hint for possible midrash).

Romans 11:29 says that the "Gifts and calling of God are irrevocable". The gifts and the call that He has given to each person (and thus to groups of people, for He did, after all, organize the children of Israel into tribes) cannot be taken back by Him, even if the person or people group does not use these gifts to serve God or glorify Him. The root gifts will always be there, as long as the person is living, and if he or she has offspring, will be passed down to them. Now, a person's choices, I believe, can affect whether or not those gifts are given in their purity and not tainted or twisted in any way, for a life lived unto the Lord is blessed and one's children are blessed. But God is merciful even to the disobedient. Oftentimes, a calling that goes unheeded by a parent, will be transferred and the oppotunity to fulfill the call or destiny, will be available to one's children. To me, this shows the loving kindness and mercy of God.

I believe as a parent, I can identify the possible giftings in mine and my husband's family, and with prayer and discernment, can identify and then nurture those giftings and callings in my children's lives. It is a wonderful adventure and discovery as a parent to find what your child is good at and then become a parental steward for the gift until the child grows to maturity and then must steward the gift for him or herself.

My husband's father was in the military, but he was also a professional artist in San Francisco, during the time of the beatniks. Some of his work is still available online for viewing. His style was abstract. He was also known for constructing such complex structures as model ships. But as my husband points out, he would use actual blueprints for ships found in the library, rather than the instructions that come with the individual model. What ability and concentration that must take! I see a glimpse of this when my son plays blocks with his Daddy at night on our bed- a part of his bedtime routine. Before 12 months of age, he was able to put shapes into their corresponding holes, something which I could never do, even in kindergarten! (There is a traumatic story behind that, but enough about me!) What's remarkable is his penchant for being able to concentrate on this task for 30-45 minutes at a time!

My husband's mother (Both his parents are deceased and I lament that I never met either of them) was an expert in children's literature. She held a master's degree in early childhood education and is well-known for starting and supporting children's libraries and bookstores throughout the Bay Area. She had a passion for books. We have many of her collections. She saw how books could teach children skills, social skills, coping skills, and life lessons. She was an advocate and practicer of library readings and story-telling. I see this passion for books and stories in my baby when I break out his favorite bedtime stories. He literally LEAPS for joy!- and reaches out to grab the book as I read with abandon. His tendancy to try and eat the corners of the book, according to my observations, has everything to do with the desire to make these stories a part of himself as it does to satisfy a teething need! It is his paternal grandmother who also instilled a love of classical music in my husband which he in turn translates to Benjamin through their weekend morning ritual.

My mother is a master communicator and lover of people. She has had a career in radio for over 25 years now. If she had to work in a dark cubicle somewhere away from the rest of the world, she wouldn't be able to survive. Everyone who has met my mother says they feel as though they have known her their whole lives. Ya know the phrase....never met a stranger...? That's Benjamin's "Nonie". She is full of love and positivity. She emulates Jesus Himself with her desire to connect with people and to connect people to each other. I see Ben's love of people and sunny disposition everytime we are in public; strangers smile at him and are captivated when he smiles warmly back at them. He watches people as if watching them were a science (ok, part of his mommy in there too...I studied people, er, psychology in high school and college). But his desire to commmunicate, reach out, and be heard and understood, even by us at home I am sure comes from his maternal grandmother.

My father is a car enthusiast and a mechanical specialist. He never met a car he could not fix, or at least appreciate! And the gleem he gets in his eye when trying to teach another person about cars, machines, or how to care for them is obvious. But it is not so much the desire, as much as the importance of being exactly precise about the information, care, and procedures. And the ensuing pride when one is fixed or made more beautiful in the end. It is like looking at a master craftsman stepping back, resting and admiring his work, much like the Creator of the universe when He rested on the seventh day after making the intricacies of creation. I see this in Benjamin when he organizes his toys as best he can and makes sure he gets all of the components in their proper places, then looks up at me with a big smile, admiring his completeness.

My father was also quite the athlete, a trait which both he and my mother passed on to my younger brother. My father set records in basketball in high school, which to the time of my childhood still had not been broken. My brother is an incredible pitcher, a prospect of major league scouts in high school no less and to this day manages up to 2 successful softball teams at a time, making trips to state and national levels a yearly event for his teams. I see this in Benjamin's strength! Anyone who knows my son knows he is very strong, and potentially athletic, despite the fact of being born 6 weeks early and fighting for the ability just to breathe right in a hospital incubator. It is also a testament to the ability to overcome adverse circumstances, a trait I see in every single one of the people I have mentioned in this blog.

Then I know of attributes which are not passed through blood and DNA, per se, but the soveriegn orchestrating of events by God and the intricate threads of our lives whereby significant others come into playing a part in our very being...

My stepmother is a diva when it comes to domesticity. If you have enjoyed any of my treats in the past, or my ability to pick out your favorites, it is partly due to that fact that I am a sugar addict, but it is most certainly due to the fact that I watched my stepmother in the kitchen and the home. The consistency with which she cared for the home, her husband and children, ran a large household and did it with a sense of duty to faith in God was noted by this writer from a very young age. I believe love of home is most definitely seen in my son, every time our SUV nears home from a long journey, or even a trip to the corner grocery store. He is at ease at home. He knows it is a place where he will get his emotional as well as his physical needs met.

Then there's my stepfather. He loves people and he does it with gusto! He is known everywhere as the Candy Man because he gives a piece of candy to everyone he meets. He never had anything in the world (especially including time) which he wasn't willing to give up for someone else's benefit. And he communicates this with humor and humility. I can see his gifting being the ability to connect with every person, whehter born to privelege or poverty, he does not care which side of the tracks a person is from. I can see this trait influencing my son as well, every time my son offers up a toy to share and a huge grin doing it.

And finally, last but not least my son's Daddy is the most compassionate person I have ever met! That is why I married him. I also admire his wisdom, which he himself would tell you, came through many trials by fire. He can put himself in the shoes of any person, and yet knows the proper way to respond in a given situation. And he doesn't often give in to platitudes, but looks at the intentions of a person's heart. He knows when someone is not being truthful or full of integrity. But he lovingly if not also plainly directs them back. I see the traits of Father God in him. He has a love of the truth, which I clearly see in his oldest son Anthony who is a writer, artist, and record producer, and yet tempers it with compassion for people and circumstance, which I most definitely see in his middle son Jonathan and the youngest, Benjamin. Benjamin, much like his father, can concentrate for hours on any given task or circumstance with patience. His father does this especially if it is a biblical principle. He engages it with courage and patience until the real truth or application to life emerges. I see this every time he plays with our son. Our son listens to his father, taking him seriously, observing his father's words, much like the father encourages the son to do in the book of Proverbs. My husband is also all for helping- no matter the task, however menial others might perceive it to be, he has a faithful servant's heart.

I know there are many more people that have definitely and indellibly had their mark on what is to become my son's destiny. My grandmother Ruth, who, as her name suggests, was a friend to many and who had upwards of 300 people attend her funeral, my 2 aunts, Judy and Janice, who have certainly influenced the person I have become as an adult, and others have not labored in vain, when it comes to me and my family! And then there's our spiritual family, the mishpocah...(and I would need a volume of books for them!) Too many valuable traits to mention in just 1 blog, but perhaps I can introduce you to them (with their permission) in later blogs in a fitting way.

Whether our son ends up being a great communicator, writer, preacher, teacher, or a craftsman in the arts, music, or technology, or a star athlete, which any of these paths would be most fesible, one thing is for certain: it sure is fun to discover such traits that are given by God Himself and passed on to our posterity. To sit and ponder such is encouraged in the scriptures. Today our lives are filled with such junk on tv and internet as...gossip, bad news, happenings, wickedness, that I would rather follow the advice of Phillipians 4:8 and try to make it a discilpline in life:

Finally, brothers, whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is fair, whatever is acceptable, whatever is pure, whatever is acceptable, whatever is commendable, if there is anything of excellence, and if there is anything praise-worthy, keep thinking on these things.