In the Fire

It has been a really ROUGH week. I am taking a break from my series on the Hebrew root of the Christian faith just so I can get my bearings and perhaps process all the stresses that have hit me this week.



My doctor told me I have placenta previa. Which, the condition is not serious in itself (the placenta moves on it's own away from the cervix in most cases before the due date) but I am sure that stress does not help this process. If I should start bleeding, it's bedrest for me and who can do bedrest with a two year old active toddler running around?



My family is having to make major financial decisions that will affect us for years to come. I do not want to dwell on this. I have always trusted in the Lord to provide for me and He always has. It just adds fuel to the fire.



A family member I care for very much has a substance abuse problem. This is being enabled by a "professional" who is not acting so professionally. This affects my whole family.



My two year old has taken to challenging almost everything I say. Which is normal for a two year old, I understand. But when hormones are the order of the day, it just makes you want to lock him outside (which I would never do) or eat 1/2 of a can of frosting (which I did), despite the fact I am trying to get over a systemic infection that has lasted well over a month and sugar only exacerbates..



The icing on the cake is my weight has now broken the 200lb. mark (I am 5'2 if you can imagine). I have never been this heavy before in my entire life, even as an overweight young adult, which I worked so hard to change my lifestyle and get it off. (about 60-70 lbs weight loss).

There is economic disaster looming on the horizon for our nation of which would make the Great Depression look like an economic recovery. This will cause food shortages, and the oh-so- desired civil unrest which follows. Last night I heard a report that the central valley of California (where I live) which produces the majority of the agricultural commerce for the state of Calif and upwards o 13% of agriculture for the nation, is having a drought. However, this drought cannot be blamed on global warming (as if!), but rather on an environmental control that says get your own water, we are trying to save the fishes. (I am not joking). Is this the focus of my rant? Of course not, but it does nothing to relieve the stress I already had.

There is strife between some very good friends of mine in the Body of Messiah. This is mostly due to a personality difference and a misunderstanding, however, because of the component of ministry, the spiritual warfare factor is intense. Moreover, the person who needs to resolve it is not one for confrontation. All future plans for ministry as well as recreational fellowship hinge on getting over this impasse.



Thank God I am getting a decent night's sleep these days, or you may see them hauling me off in a goofy wagon wearing a stylish white jacket with innovative arm pockets. (Sleep deprivation is not my idea of a ride at the fair).



Tonight in my Beth Moore Bible study on the book of Daniel, we will be going over the passage of the three Hebrews in the fire. I so need to hear, read, and breathe that Fourth Man in the fire. Because it gives me hope that He is in the fire with me. He is my hope and the only reason I have to hope. I can be kicked out of my house tomorrow and have to pray food on the table, but I know that God loves me, He will always take care of me. And this is not all about me. It is about His plans which are sometimes far and above what we could imagine or see. They are about His glory. And so I pull myself up in the Spirit of the Lord the way David did, I take great comfort in the fact I am not forsaken, not abandoned, and that this too shall pass. For goodness sake, for all I know, God could be preparing me for bigger and hotter fires! And I pray I will not have the slightest smell of smoke on me after all is said and done.